Skip to main content
Topic: Texas style survivor  (Read 419 times) previous topic - next topic

Texas style survivor


I take no credit for this. A fellow member on sig forum posted this. I figured  it would get a good laugh.

"Survivor - Texas Style"
Due to the popularity of the TV "Survivor" shows, Texas is planning to do one entitled: "Survivor - Texas-Style!"

The lucky contestants will all start in Dallas, drive to Waco, Austin, San Antonio, then over to Houston and down to Brownsville. They will then proceed up to Del Rio, El Paso, Odessa, Midland, Lubbock and Amarillo. From there they will go on to Abilene and Fort Worth. Finally, back to Dallas.
Each contestant will be driving a pink Prius with 15 bumper stickers which will read:

1. "I'm A Democrat"
2. "Amnesty For Illegals"
3. "I Love The Dixie Chicks"
4. "Boycott Beef"
5. "I Voted For Obama"
6. "George Strait Sucks"
7. "Elect Hillary In 2020"
8. "Vote Eric Holder - Texas Governor"
9. "Rosie O'Donnell Is Texas Born"
10. "I Love Obama Care and Chuck Schumer"
11. "Barney Frank Is My Hero"
12. "I Side With Jane Fonda"
13. "It's all Bush's Fault"
14. "Islam Is A Peace-Loving Religion"
- and the last sticker is:
15. "I'm Here To Confiscate Your Guns"

The first contestant to make it back to Dallas alive wins

 

Re: Texas style survivor

Reply #1
Too Funny!
They should select yankee or left coast college students majoring in gender studies.

Add two more sticker;
"My Education Would Have Been Free If You Would Have Only Fealt the Bern"
"Veteran Benefits Make Me Sad"

Re: Texas style survivor

Reply #2
That would have been funny to watch a couple of years ago but they might make it through untouched seeing as how Texas is swinging blue these days. ::)
Plus you forgot to add a California plate to those Prius's! :))
I had a dream! Free at last, Free at last! Moving to Idaho

Re: Texas style survivor

Reply #3
Texas once was, one of the deepest blue states in the Union.
It does seem to be swingin' that way again.

George Straight does suck......
Keeping my bad Kharma intact since 1952

Re: Texas style survivor

Reply #4
It takes a war to change direction, just gotta ride it out 'till the next one.
Chris

Re: Texas style survivor

Reply #5

George Straight does suck......

Everytime I get to thinking you're alright Fuj you go and prove me wrong. I won't hold it against though because everyone is entitled to their opinion no matter how wrong it is!😁
Dave

Re: Texas style survivor

Reply #6
Everytime I get to thinking you're alright Fuj you go and prove me wrong. I won't hold it against though because everyone is entitled to their opinion no matter how wrong it is!😁

Same here Junior. I could imagine you crackin' gears going down
the road listening to "Highway to Hell"  I guessed wrong, I guess.

I like most kinds, of music. Mainly an old rock n' roller with one foot
in the grave. Don't mind a little fusion jazz from time to time.  I
probably should apologize for the George Straight comment, since
it's mainly his area that he preforms in that I just can't wrap my
head around. Never could.....But we both agree about Savage rifle's,
so your not a lost cause just yet..... 
Keeping my bad Kharma intact since 1952

Re: Texas style survivor

Reply #7
nothing wrong with a little high way to hell... throw in its a long way to the top and the stereo is cranked up.... ole George is ok too... hes not George jones but hes ok...:)
Grant

Re: Texas style survivor

Reply #8
Texas once was, one of the deepest blue states in the Union.
It does seem to be swingin' that way again.

George Straight does suck......

with more people moving from the Left coast its not suprising Texas is getting more Liberal in the big towns

Re: Texas style survivor

Reply #9
with more people moving from the Left coast its not suprising Texas is getting more Liberal in the big towns

It ain't the quantity but the quality of them evacuees from the left coast. Liberals that can't afford to live a decent life here are packing up as fast as those of us moderates that can't tolerate the flaming liberals in office. I fit right in with my neighbors in Idaho and all my Texas friends are sad I did not chose to live by them. The elk hunting won me over. I can handle Mormon country versus Hoodratville
I had a dream! Free at last, Free at last! Moving to Idaho

Re: Texas style survivor

Reply #10
I am thinking of starting a petition to remove all of the "Welcome to Arizona" signs that face West. We need to replace them with "Welcome to a state that still values Personal Freedom and Rights. Please leave your Liberal "Utopian" Mandates on your side of the state line."
That California mentality is a cancer to the rest of the country. They are not making anything better, they are just taxing the residents to death to pay for the 65% of the state that lives off from handouts. Plain and simple.
I say build the border wall up AZ, NV, and Southern Oregon!
Stay the F#$% out of states that are successful due to common sense legislation.
We're the 24th Infantry Regiment... We're Supposed to be Surrounded!

Re: Texas style survivor

Reply #11
That California mentality is a cancer to the rest of the country. They are not making anything better, they are just taxing the residents to death to pay for the 65% of the state that lives off from handouts.

California just took a hit from the FCC on their attempt to create a text message tax and make it effective for 5 years retroactive to pay for the low income free cellular phone program here. Why do hoodrats need a cell phone? Drug dealers are getting free service cell phones to conduct business on taxpayers money. A cell phone is not a right nor is a telephone.
I had a dream! Free at last, Free at last! Moving to Idaho

Re: Texas style survivor

Reply #12
Cell phones are not a right.  Nor is education and health care.  Everybody that can work should have to pay for their healthcare and education.  Those that are truly unable to pay will be taken care of by the benevolence of us hard workers.
Those that refuse to work ( and work hard) deserve nothing from those that do.  There are a lot of young people that don't know the meaning of work.  The schools and colleges are now filling their heads with bull$##t that they deserve things without teaching them the definition of earning!
11X Grandfather
Part time Savagesmith

Re: Texas style survivor

Reply #13
The VERY best bumper sticker I've seen was:

"Never thought I'd miss Nixon"  (Ask Gen. Mattis about that. I think he has similar sentiments.)

Amen!

Well, gotta go now and take a Trump. Must be the Ex-Lax I took - or the prune juice.

Eric B.
"I can stop buying guns and gun stuff anytime I want - I've done it hundreds of times."

Re: Texas style survivor

Reply #14
Same here Junior. I could imagine you crackin' gears going down
the road listening to "Highway to Hell"  I guessed wrong, I guess.

I like most kinds, of music. Mainly an old rock n' roller with one foot
in the grave. Don't mind a little fusion jazz from time to time.  I
probably should apologize for the George Straight comment, since
it's mainly his area that he preforms in that I just can't wrap my
head around. Never could.....But we both agree about Savage rifle's,
so your not a lost cause just yet..... 


I'm a complex individual whose tastes transcend many genres of musical styles and yes I did spend many years "on the highway to hell" and still go there occasionally but I listen to way more old rock than country. 
Dave